IS IT I?
‘And as they did eat, He said, Verily I say unto you, that one of you shall betray Me. And they were exceeding sorrowful, and began every one of them to say unto Him, Lord, is it I?’
It was a moment of dismay among the disciples of Jesus. Each man’s anxiety is turned towards himself, and they ask one after another, ‘Lord, is it I?’ There are times in the lives of us all when that comes to us which came here to Christ’s disciples, occasions when our self-complacency is shaken and the sense of our own possibilities of sin awakened. Let us consider some of them:—
I. When other men sin frequently.—The act is repugnant, but yet the act is human. Just as the goodness of the best men makes that goodness seem not impossible to us, so the wickedness of the worst stirs up the sense of the human power of sinfulness which we too possess.
II. When we commit a venial sin.—We recognise the deep power of sinfulness by which we do it. The least impurity, with some hideous spectre of lust rising before you, makes you cry out: ‘Oh, is it I? Can I come to that?’
III. When men suspect us.—The charge or insinuation may be utterly unwarrantable and false, but the mere fastening of the sin and our name together must turn our eyes in upon ourselves and set us to asking, ‘Is it impossible?’
IV. When men praise us.—This should awaken within us the sense of how bad we have the power to be. No true man is ever so humble and so afraid of himself as when others are praising him most loudly.
V. When we are tempted.—To resist temptation is never an exhilarating experience. We remember too vividly how near we came to yielding. The man who dares to laugh at a temptation which he has felt and resisted is not yet wholly safe out of its power. What is all this but saying that in every serious moment of life the possibility of sinning stands before us. Is this calculated to help or harm? Turn and study the Bible picture of human life portrayed in the scene before us. ‘Lord, is it I?’ We compare it with our own human life, and it explains everything. In the doubters of themselves we see the weakness which comes of self-knowledge, and the distressed cry, ‘Lord, is it I?’ as one hears the announcement of some dreadful sin; in the faithful believers in Christ we see that wondering faith which cries ‘Lord, is it I?’—but it is the cry of those who ‘are strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.’
—Bishop Phillips Brooks.
Illustration
‘Better lose sight of the mysterious capacity of life altogether than to see one side only—better forget that you are a sinner, and never dare to realise what a sinner you are, or may be, if there be no Saviour to save you from sin; but if there is, and you see Him, then feel the depth below you, and let it make you cling to Him more closely; realise the power of sinfulness, even in its worst forms, that you may realise also the power of holiness in all its beauty; know what a sinner you might have been, that you may know more deeply the salvation which has saved you,’