‘And Esau said, “Let me now leave with you some of the folk who are with me.” And he said, “What is the need? Let me find grace in the sight of my lord.” So Esau returned that day on his way to Seir.'
Esau recognises the wisdom of what Jacob says, and is probably somewhat relieved. But at least he feels he can leave some of his people to help with the herding and provide further protection, although this may again have been a gesture between kinsfolk.
But Jacob certainly does not want to have Esau's men there ensuring that they go to Seir. Nor is he certain what secret instructions they might be given. He is still all suspicion. He judges others by his own complicated make up. But the fact that he is able to make a case (‘what is the need') demonstrates that he has a reasonably satisfactory band of men himself.
“Let me find favour in the sight of my lord.” A polite way of requesting that his wishes be honoured.
“So Esau returned that day on his way to Seir.” No doubt both were relieved. The one because he would not be tied down to a laborious and boring task and, having fulfilled his family obligations, was now free to go his way unhindered. The other because he was free from what he would have seen as a constant threat, and would not have to go to Seir after all.
Seir was a mountainous area South of the Dead Sea. It was well suited to Esau's men who no doubt saw it as a good land. It was away from strong cities and larger groupings of peoples, provided a safe refuge when he had been on his raids, and yet provided sufficient reasonably fertile land for feeding herds and planting crops for the maintenance of the group. But this was not Jacob's idea of the ideal land at all. He believed firmly in the promises of Yahweh and they did not relate to Seir. And he preferred to be peaceable rather than belligerent. And who could tell when Esau's attitude might change? He could always provide some excuse in the distant future as to why he had not continued his journey southward.
(As mentioned previously, Esau spent part of his time with the family tribe, assisting the blind Isaac and overseeing the tending of his own herds and flocks at crucial times, and part of the time in Seir ‘in the time when men go forth to battle' (2 Samuel 11:1), adventuring with his men. He was connected by marriage to the Hivites who dwelt there (Genesis 36:2). It is hardly conceivable that a doting son like Esau has shown himself to be would leave Isaac totally alone without assistance when Jacob was absent, and the fact that Esau's whereabouts is known demonstrates that he keeps close connections with his family while enjoying his wilder life with his men).