‘And he said to him also who had invited him, “When you make a dinner or a supper, do not call friends, nor your brothers, nor your kinsmen, nor rich neighbours, in case they also invite you in return, and a recompense be made to you.” '
The passage begins with Jesus suggesting to His host, the ruler who was a Pharisee (Luke 14:1), that when next time he makes a supper or dinner he should not invite those who will return his invitation and thus recompense him for what he has done. For there is no goodness in that. It is simply a part of the social round. It may earn him a reputation as being a good host, but it will earn no plaudits from God.
Jesus is not, of course, discouraging family gatherings. He is rather using them to get over His point that the poor and needy should not be overlooked, and that what we do for them counts even more than what we do in this way for our families. We must remember that He had Himself attended many such gatherings (Martha and Mary had not invited the poor and the maimed, the lame and the blind - Luke 10:38-42). Jesus would have encouraged all kinds of relationships if they were leading to the betterment of men and women. But He desired especially that they would not forget the poor.